Exploring The Energy Behind Symptoms

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I painted this when I was young, maybe close to 10-12 years old. It happened sparatically after my grandmother lead me through the sensations I was experiencing. She practiced and used to receive Reiki. As an adult, I would describe it as a Shamanic experience or vision quest.

I had a high fever from the flu. This painting is a rendering of how the energy felt in my body at the time. This painting is special to me, as it marks my first experience being aware of the subtle energies related to sickness that can be felt as "densities" in the energy system.

This has led me to ask more questions about the universe, humanity and sickness as I grew up. I eventually learned that this was a form of remote viewing. The data is contextual and hyperdimensional. We gain access to this subtle flirting with our conciousness when we clear our minds of the constriction held there.

It was a defining moment for me, as my grandmother encouraged me to explore the fear there instead of resigning from it. This has formed the basis for my awareness practice. It also brought me to a new understanding of disease and trauma.

When I look at this painting today, it clearly resembles an aomeba-like form. The colors were intended to be a muddy, redish brown to resemble the congestion and heat I was experiencing.

There was another energetic "form" I was experiencing, that I am well aware of even today if I get sick. It felt like a heavy weight that consumed my whole body. Even at that age, I compared it to a massive mound of clay that was dumped on top of me, weighing me down. Pushing against this clay resulted in resistance - the resistance to my healing.

As my grandmother was leading me through this Shamanic passage into higher awareness, I began exploring that dense pressure instead of fighting it.

This experience may have helps the sickness clear up. That part I do not remember. However, the event struck a realization in me that had to be documented. Even as this watercolor painting was in process, I was feeling those sense energies in my body, even after I was well. The process enlivened me.

What do you see in the painting? Do you ever just stop and feel?

Joey Esposito - Bioenergist

Reactivity Protocol

When we are in a problem set, we cannot see the solution. It seems to be outside of us. To escape the loop of suffering, we must suspend the notion of an external threat - to become aware that the physio-emotional experience resides within our own being. This is not to say that there is never an external threat. But rather, acknowledging that all sensation arises from within - always.

Claiming responsibility for our own reactivity, making it still through our awareness by simply seeing it "as is", releases the constriction in mind.

We can always drop the story and follow the feeling.

Take 1 breath deeply and slowly, directing the airflow into the ribcage. Then claim this statement out loud (preferable) or in your mind, "This is how I feel right now." Then, Note the level of intensity from 1-10, 10 being extremely upset.

This is how you claim responsibility for the feeling you are having by directing your attention to the body which calms the mind.

Continue to breath this way as you proceed to take a moment to scan your present environment. A majority of the time the physio-emotional life-event, that initially instigated your upset, has already passed and the perceived threat resides only in mind. Realizing there is no current threat to your body calms the nervous system.

Then ask the question out loud (preferable) or in your mind, "Now how do I feel?" Take a new #, noticing the intensity of your upset has decreased.

It always decreases if you follow these steps.

The active mechanism in this practice is realizing the downshift, from upset to serenity, regardless of how slight.

To complete the exercise, immediately shift your attention to something else. It can be completely random and arbitrary. It would be most beneficial to choose an activity that includes physical discharge. Maybe you go for a walk, wash the dishes, run an errand, complete a task or simply take a nice bath. Regardless of the action, the active mechanism here is the immediate shift into a different activity.

What was once believed to be an unknown force, residing outside of your grasp, now becomes an internalized cauldron of alchemical fire - extinguishing false notions of the limited self, resulting in a radiant array of clear, right-minded disposition to the object of interest.

- The Bioenergist

Healing As a Crutch

Healing is about changing your perspective on what is possible. You're limited judgement brought on your suffering in the first place. If you aren't willing to see things differently, then you will remain fixated on your current state and you will carry this with you until you decide otherwise. If you decide to carry this legacy of pain with you, it will convolute the matrix of your being. How you perceive yourself will become distorted and so the way you interpret sense data will be incongruent to the reality. Under this pyshio-emotional condition, your reactions may be also be falsely asserted upon others. This infects them with the same mind parasite you suffer from.

You must become aware of your tendency to react in order to re-calibrate your nervous system to the environment. Violence at any level is the result of emotions not being properly digested, accepted and discharged. Your stories are merely holding patterns that prevent you from doing so. This is the basis for trauma energetics.

It must also be reinforced that as long as one remains in a state of healing, that individual will continue to remain constricted from doing their work. Healing is just as much a crutch as an addiction to a substance. Once you allow yourself to change you must move swiftly to a new idea. You are to shed the ways of the old and don't look back! We don't steer the boat by looking at the wake.

Yet some people don't want to heal. They would rather hold on to their wounds and talk about their past because this is familiar to them. It grounds them to something they can hold onto. If they are accepted by others, then they can be accepted by the whole of society. The irony is everyone feels this way. No one wants to be judged. Everyone wants to be accepted.

Those who succeed crucify themselves to their fear. They represent themselves honestly without worry that their peers will judge them. In my conscious exploration here on this planet, I work to be one of those people. I do not fear upsetting those who refrain from practicing the conscious awareness work necessary in order to self realize their tendency to react to information when it brings up uncomfortable emotions.

If we are to defeat codependency in the polarity process of reality, we must all be the mirror to each other and not supplicate ourselves for someone else's comfort. You are not capable of that anyway. The suffering they are experiencing is due to their own lack of awareness and your notion that you can change that for them is your own dis-ease and lack of understanding.

Someone else's reaction to the information you present is never your responsibility, no matter who it is, no matter what the content of the message. You are only responsible for clearing your own negative charges so stop putting it off and get to work!

With that said, it may be clear to you now that telling others to "wake up" is self-defeating. If you were "awake" you would already understand that your suffering, and all the reasons you concocted to prevent yourself from changing, were your creations and thus, your responsibility to correct by becoming right-minded. We become right-minded by realizing we created it all and if we created it, we can change it because change is what we are!

By remaining in mourning and hesitating to make adjustments we abide by fear and we hold on to our emotional poison. The result of this fear will reveal more attempts by government to control the populace. In fact, we created government as a result of denying our innate power to use our own free will to govern ourselves. If our relationship to government isn't sustainable, we can change it by embracing a new idea.

Control is the opposite of change which is a movement and there must be movement in order for there to be health. We must move through times of difficulty by allowing it to pass. This is why our interpretation of a feeling is called an eMOTION. There is no threat present when you are simply having a feeling when it is merely a sensation. It's the interpretation of it that creates human drama. Like all things, it will recede if you allow it to express itself fully.

This too shall pass!

This is the true function of comparison in society and how we define culture which shapes our moralistic outlook on consensual purpose. We relate to each other so that we can witness the effects of our behaviour on one another and to test the sustainability of our creations in order to make adjustments. In order to make adjustments though, we must face our failures and embrace the unknown. Most importantly, we must remember to be gentle with ourselves and others as it will take time for the cultivation of this new intention to rise...

It will rise.

And so it is!

- Joey The Bioenergist